1 00:00:02,560 --> 00:00:05,320 Ah! Nnh, spla! Ooh! 2 00:00:08,120 --> 00:00:09,120 Is this a joke? 3 00:00:10,240 --> 00:00:11,760 Yeah! 4 00:00:14,080 --> 00:00:15,280 Hmm. Oh! 5 00:00:21,000 --> 00:00:22,280 Oh, I like that! 6 00:00:23,440 --> 00:00:24,960 Wow! Hmm. 7 00:00:33,320 --> 00:00:34,760 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 8 00:00:34,800 --> 00:00:38,320 Hello! Hello, and welcome to Taskmaster. 9 00:00:38,360 --> 00:00:41,560 I'm Greg Davies and I've been Taskmaster for some time now, 10 00:00:41,600 --> 00:00:44,520 and sometimes children stop me in the street 11 00:00:44,560 --> 00:00:46,600 and they say, "Why are you so mean?" 12 00:00:46,640 --> 00:00:48,480 And I always smile and I reply, 13 00:00:48,520 --> 00:00:51,400 "Why are you talking to me? You don't know me. 14 00:00:51,440 --> 00:00:54,840 "Where are your parents anyway? What are you, feral? 15 00:00:54,880 --> 00:00:58,120 "Look at me. Look at me, are you crying now, are you? 16 00:00:58,160 --> 00:00:59,400 "Good, get your mum. 17 00:00:59,440 --> 00:01:01,960 "Get your mum and I'll tell her the same. 18 00:01:02,000 --> 00:01:03,720 "I'm not scared of your mum." 19 00:01:03,760 --> 00:01:08,360 So, let's meet the in-studio children 20 00:01:08,400 --> 00:01:11,040 desperate for Daddy's approval. 21 00:01:11,080 --> 00:01:16,200 They are Alan Davies, Desiree Burch, 22 00:01:16,240 --> 00:01:19,920 Guz Khan, Morgana Robinson 23 00:01:19,960 --> 00:01:22,120 and Victoria Coren Mitchell. 24 00:01:22,160 --> 00:01:25,600 And sitting next to me, a man who once drunkenly told me 25 00:01:25,640 --> 00:01:27,720 that when it comes to childcare, 26 00:01:27,760 --> 00:01:30,640 he doesn't think his wife Rachel pulls her weight. 27 00:01:30,680 --> 00:01:32,680 It's... little Alex Horne! 28 00:01:36,080 --> 00:01:38,040 Might be the worst one, I think. 29 00:01:39,840 --> 00:01:42,520 How are you? I'm all right. I'm very calm. 30 00:01:42,560 --> 00:01:44,440 Oh, good, why are you so calm? 31 00:01:44,480 --> 00:01:45,640 I've started meditating. 32 00:01:45,680 --> 00:01:48,600 I'm listening to some motivational confidence-boosting music. 33 00:01:48,640 --> 00:01:49,600 Can I hear it? 34 00:01:49,640 --> 00:01:51,520 It's quite personal. Let's have a listen. 35 00:01:51,560 --> 00:01:54,880 I don't know if this will work. 36 00:01:54,920 --> 00:01:58,280 FROM EARPHONES: a man called Greg 37 00:01:58,320 --> 00:02:00,280 ♪ He's just a man called Greg 38 00:02:00,320 --> 00:02:03,960 ♪ He's just a man called Greg He's just a man called Greg 39 00:02:04,000 --> 00:02:05,800 ♪ He's just a man called Greg 40 00:02:05,840 --> 00:02:08,640 ♪ He's just a man called Greg He's just a man called Greg 41 00:02:08,680 --> 00:02:10,400 ♪ You'll be the Taskmaster soon... ♪ 42 00:02:10,440 --> 00:02:12,400 That's all there is, that's all there is. 43 00:02:15,120 --> 00:02:18,000 You may well end up being the Taskmaster soon, 44 00:02:18,040 --> 00:02:22,000 but I promise you this, there is only one way that will happen 45 00:02:22,040 --> 00:02:23,480 and I will have to die. 46 00:02:23,520 --> 00:02:26,720 Good, right, what have we got for the prize task this week? 47 00:02:26,760 --> 00:02:28,080 Well, Greg, you've asked them 48 00:02:28,120 --> 00:02:30,440 to bring in the best thing that has quite a few layers. 49 00:02:30,480 --> 00:02:32,560 Ooh, five points will be awarded 50 00:02:32,600 --> 00:02:34,320 for the best thing with quite a few layers 51 00:02:34,360 --> 00:02:36,120 and the winner of the episode will go home 52 00:02:36,160 --> 00:02:38,640 all layered up like the thick leg of an Arctic explorer 53 00:02:38,680 --> 00:02:40,280 all wrapped up in lovely thermals 54 00:02:40,320 --> 00:02:44,120 from one of those outdoor equipment shops. Right. Victoria. Yes. 55 00:02:44,160 --> 00:02:47,440 What's the thing you've brought in with lots of layers? 56 00:02:47,480 --> 00:02:48,880 A poultry farmer. Oh. 57 00:02:48,920 --> 00:02:53,120 Here it is. OK, little toy poultry farmer with lots of chickens. 58 00:02:53,160 --> 00:02:55,520 Oh, layers! Layers. Oh. Very punny. 59 00:02:55,560 --> 00:02:56,720 It's, it's a joke. 60 00:02:56,760 --> 00:03:00,240 It's a pun, and I love jokes. And the joke is... Layers. 61 00:03:00,280 --> 00:03:03,760 Yeah, chickens lay eggs. Egg-zactly! Yeah. They lay. 62 00:03:03,800 --> 00:03:05,880 Oh, you were waiting for that setup. 63 00:03:05,920 --> 00:03:09,520 Yeah. And that's just got more points. 64 00:03:11,400 --> 00:03:13,400 I assumed you liked humour! 65 00:03:13,440 --> 00:03:16,840 Let's be absolutely clear, it is a joke. OK. 66 00:03:16,880 --> 00:03:20,520 Where's a thing with a lot of layers? Here, because they lay eggs. 67 00:03:20,560 --> 00:03:26,600 Da-da! It's a joke. I thank you, I've decided. OK. Desiree. 68 00:03:26,640 --> 00:03:28,680 What I brought in is a Nilla wafer pudding. 69 00:03:28,720 --> 00:03:32,120 Uh, it is a banana pudding with these vanilla wafers. 70 00:03:32,160 --> 00:03:35,760 It's one of those things that's like my mom used to make. 71 00:03:35,800 --> 00:03:38,360 It's like, you know, like, moms have a recipe 72 00:03:38,400 --> 00:03:40,000 that has, like, some martyrdom inside 73 00:03:40,040 --> 00:03:42,440 and it makes it taste extra good? I don't know how to do that. 74 00:03:42,480 --> 00:03:45,160 So I made my version and I hope you like it. 75 00:03:45,200 --> 00:03:46,680 Here is her Nilla cake. 76 00:03:46,720 --> 00:03:48,680 Mums have martyrdom inside? 77 00:03:48,720 --> 00:03:50,520 Yes, they have this sainthood of being like, 78 00:03:50,560 --> 00:03:52,360 "You ruined my vagina and my life. 79 00:03:52,400 --> 00:03:55,400 "Everything I will make you will taste amazing 80 00:03:55,440 --> 00:03:58,280 "because you can never achieve this level of sainthood." 81 00:03:58,320 --> 00:04:02,760 I've never sensed that in my mum's cooking. 82 00:04:02,800 --> 00:04:06,440 Guz. Hello. I mean, you're gonna crash straight ahead of these two, 83 00:04:06,480 --> 00:04:09,800 I know it. What have you bought in that's got layers? 84 00:04:09,840 --> 00:04:11,640 I bought a load of my jackets 85 00:04:11,680 --> 00:04:14,600 and I put as many as humanly possible on Alex. 86 00:04:14,640 --> 00:04:16,280 Here I am in all his coats. 87 00:04:16,320 --> 00:04:19,080 And let me explain why and justify why I did this, OK? Uh... 88 00:04:19,120 --> 00:04:21,360 Please justify, because I can feel these people 89 00:04:21,400 --> 00:04:22,920 moving forward on their seats. 90 00:04:25,760 --> 00:04:29,640 What I would argue is that this show, and possibly your role... 91 00:04:29,680 --> 00:04:32,360 Yeah. ..wouldn't be what it is without him. 92 00:04:32,400 --> 00:04:35,520 Yeah. And therefore, him, in all my coats... 93 00:04:35,560 --> 00:04:36,880 Can I tell you? Yeah. 94 00:04:36,920 --> 00:04:38,320 You've just blown it. 95 00:04:38,360 --> 00:04:39,960 LAUGHTER 96 00:04:42,960 --> 00:04:46,600 Pudding's looking real tasty right now, huh? Yeah. Man. 97 00:04:46,640 --> 00:04:48,600 If someone could tell me a joke 98 00:04:48,640 --> 00:04:51,480 while I was filling my face full of that pudding... 99 00:04:51,520 --> 00:04:52,720 HE WHISTLES APPRECIATIVELY 100 00:04:52,760 --> 00:04:54,720 Morgana. Vegetable lasagne. 101 00:04:54,760 --> 00:04:57,280 Vegetable lasagne. Here it is. Right. 102 00:04:57,320 --> 00:05:01,000 Not even one that looks nice. 103 00:05:01,040 --> 00:05:04,240 I like to eat mine in the dark. OK? 104 00:05:04,280 --> 00:05:08,800 It's creamy, it's comforting. Jesus. 105 00:05:08,840 --> 00:05:13,240 It's delicious. There's no meat in it because I'm saving the planet. 106 00:05:13,280 --> 00:05:17,760 Yeah. Sometimes the things that look the worst taste scrumptious. 107 00:05:17,800 --> 00:05:19,280 Yeah. Thank you. Yeah. 108 00:05:19,320 --> 00:05:22,880 I've been saying that for years. It's rubbish. Good. Alan. 109 00:05:22,920 --> 00:05:27,680 Uh, I have brought in a wig which was made in the '90s 110 00:05:27,720 --> 00:05:32,800 for a double of me. Here is the wig. My God! 111 00:05:32,840 --> 00:05:36,680 That really was an absolute replica of what, 112 00:05:36,720 --> 00:05:39,560 what I looked like in about 1997. Has it got layers? 113 00:05:39,600 --> 00:05:43,600 It definitely has got layers. And layers, according to Cosmopolitan, 114 00:05:43,640 --> 00:05:45,320 will make your hair more full and swingy 115 00:05:45,360 --> 00:05:47,480 and leave you with tresses that beg to be touched. 116 00:05:47,520 --> 00:05:48,600 Wow. 117 00:05:48,640 --> 00:05:50,360 Ready? 118 00:05:50,400 --> 00:05:54,920 Ready. Yes. OK, I'm gonna give one point... Right. 119 00:05:54,960 --> 00:05:58,960 ..to Morgana's lasagne, because it was rubbish. Hmm. I'm one?! 120 00:05:59,000 --> 00:06:02,560 I'm gonna give twice as many points to Victoria's joke, 121 00:06:02,600 --> 00:06:04,720 and I want you to reflect on that. 122 00:06:04,760 --> 00:06:06,720 I'm giving three points to Guz 123 00:06:06,760 --> 00:06:10,800 because you spoke positively about Alex, and I don't like him. 124 00:06:12,440 --> 00:06:14,280 I'm giving four points to you 125 00:06:14,320 --> 00:06:17,640 because the banana layered cake looked delicious 126 00:06:17,680 --> 00:06:20,960 and I feel sorry for what you did to your mum. Yeah. 127 00:06:21,000 --> 00:06:23,440 And finally, just to annoy everybody, 128 00:06:23,480 --> 00:06:27,400 I'm giving a man who found an old wig in his attic five points. 129 00:06:27,440 --> 00:06:31,960 That's Taskmaster and if you don't like it, tough shit! 130 00:06:32,000 --> 00:06:35,360 Five points to Alan Davies. Tweet, tweet as much as you like. 131 00:06:38,280 --> 00:06:40,920 @ me! 132 00:06:40,960 --> 00:06:43,360 Five points to Alan Davies. Outrageous. 133 00:06:43,400 --> 00:06:45,440 Right, come on, let's get going. 134 00:06:45,480 --> 00:06:48,960 Yes, well, slow down, speed demon. 135 00:06:49,000 --> 00:06:53,200 Let's just take it nice and easy, reduce the pace and have a race. 136 00:07:05,960 --> 00:07:07,920 ♪ Oh! ♪ 137 00:07:09,960 --> 00:07:14,120 Hello. Hi, Guz. You all right? 138 00:07:15,440 --> 00:07:20,680 "Complete the course as slowly as possible." 139 00:07:20,720 --> 00:07:22,680 I need a wee. 140 00:07:22,720 --> 00:07:25,320 "You must be riding the bicycle forwards 141 00:07:25,360 --> 00:07:28,280 "within the limits of the course at all times." 142 00:07:30,800 --> 00:07:33,320 "Every time you put a foot on the ground, 143 00:07:33,360 --> 00:07:37,200 "the clock will be paused and your final time will be halved." 144 00:07:37,240 --> 00:07:38,600 That is not very nice. 145 00:07:38,640 --> 00:07:40,520 "If you leave the course or miss an instruction, 146 00:07:40,560 --> 00:07:42,480 "your time will also be halved 147 00:07:42,520 --> 00:07:46,360 "and the clock will be paused until you are back in position." 148 00:07:47,760 --> 00:07:49,080 "Slowest wins." 149 00:07:49,120 --> 00:07:52,400 "Your time starts when Alex fires his starter's pistol 150 00:07:52,440 --> 00:07:53,960 "in five minutes from now." 151 00:07:54,000 --> 00:07:59,880 Alex, is there anything really basic that you don't know how to do? 152 00:07:59,920 --> 00:08:02,560 What can't you do, Victoria? 153 00:08:04,240 --> 00:08:07,000 I never really learned to ride a bicycle. Ah. 154 00:08:07,040 --> 00:08:10,520 OK, so... Burst the red water balloon in this bucket. 155 00:08:12,200 --> 00:08:16,240 Are you joking? I have to do something as well as riding a bike? 156 00:08:16,280 --> 00:08:19,080 Where is he? Take the hat from the mannequin 157 00:08:19,120 --> 00:08:22,080 and put it on the other mannequin. Fun times. 158 00:08:22,120 --> 00:08:24,320 Ah, read the letter. On a bicycle. 159 00:08:27,480 --> 00:08:29,040 Are you good at cycling? 160 00:08:29,080 --> 00:08:30,640 Well, I mean, I can cycle. 161 00:08:30,680 --> 00:08:32,000 How hard can this be? 162 00:08:32,040 --> 00:08:35,720 You don't have one with stabilisers, I suppose? No. 163 00:08:35,760 --> 00:08:37,320 I mean, I've seen it done. 164 00:08:37,360 --> 00:08:39,080 It's not like... agh! OK. 165 00:08:44,240 --> 00:08:45,760 Agh! Is it literally... 166 00:08:45,800 --> 00:08:49,000 how long have I got to learn to ride a bike, a minute? 167 00:08:49,040 --> 00:08:50,600 One minute. One minute. 168 00:08:52,440 --> 00:08:54,400 Aah! But how do you make it stop? 169 00:09:00,720 --> 00:09:01,960 Shit! 170 00:09:02,000 --> 00:09:03,680 Argh! How are you feeling? 171 00:09:03,720 --> 00:09:07,800 Ugh, like I've just been high-beamed in the crotch, really. 172 00:09:07,840 --> 00:09:09,360 LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE 173 00:09:12,240 --> 00:09:16,200 Well, we can already see that all five of our mighty contestants 174 00:09:16,240 --> 00:09:18,560 are going to be hilarious doing this. 175 00:09:18,600 --> 00:09:21,720 There is one attempt that I am looking forward to 176 00:09:21,760 --> 00:09:23,200 more than the others. 177 00:09:23,240 --> 00:09:24,440 Can you guess who it is? Yeah. 178 00:09:24,480 --> 00:09:28,600 Do you know what, the thing is, I'm now feeling quite liberated. 179 00:09:28,640 --> 00:09:30,840 Hang on a minute, before you go off on one, 180 00:09:30,880 --> 00:09:32,680 let me ask you a direct question. Yes. 181 00:09:32,720 --> 00:09:34,360 Why can't you ride a bike? 182 00:09:34,400 --> 00:09:35,400 I just, I don't know. 183 00:09:35,440 --> 00:09:37,160 We were in central London. 184 00:09:37,200 --> 00:09:39,000 There was a lot of traffic. 185 00:09:39,040 --> 00:09:41,000 I never, I never had a bike. 186 00:09:41,040 --> 00:09:43,480 I mean, the fact that you're prepared to have a go at it is... 187 00:09:43,520 --> 00:09:44,520 Yeah. Delicious. 188 00:09:44,560 --> 00:09:46,600 And can I just check you're happy with the phrase 189 00:09:46,640 --> 00:09:47,920 "High-beamed in the crotch?" 190 00:09:47,960 --> 00:09:51,360 I was more than happy with "High-beamed in the crotch." 191 00:09:51,400 --> 00:09:52,800 Did you have a choice of bike? 192 00:09:52,840 --> 00:09:54,720 Yes, but that other bike is too small. 193 00:09:54,760 --> 00:09:57,840 I'm gonna look like a bear in a circus trying to do that thing. 194 00:09:57,880 --> 00:10:00,400 And so I just had to take the man's bike. 195 00:10:00,440 --> 00:10:01,440 Right, let's go. 196 00:10:01,480 --> 00:10:06,440 OK, well, first of all, we're going to see Alan, Desiree and Morgana. 197 00:10:06,480 --> 00:10:09,280 On your marks, get set, slow. 198 00:10:09,320 --> 00:10:10,560 OK, good luck, Alan. 199 00:10:10,600 --> 00:10:12,640 Good luck, Morgana. Thank you. 200 00:10:12,680 --> 00:10:14,480 Good luck, Desiree. Jesus. 201 00:10:14,520 --> 00:10:19,160 Your time starts... task. 202 00:10:19,200 --> 00:10:22,080 SHE LAUGHS 203 00:10:22,120 --> 00:10:25,800 This is going way too fast. 204 00:10:27,560 --> 00:10:31,680 Oh, oh, oh, oh! Oh. 205 00:10:31,720 --> 00:10:34,160 Argh! 206 00:10:35,280 --> 00:10:37,400 Oh, it didn't burst. What do I do? 207 00:10:37,440 --> 00:10:39,800 Well, what do the instructions say? 208 00:10:39,840 --> 00:10:42,240 Start again? 209 00:10:42,280 --> 00:10:44,160 Oh, Jeez. 210 00:10:44,200 --> 00:10:45,640 Oh, no! 211 00:10:45,680 --> 00:10:47,280 I've just paused the clock. 212 00:10:47,320 --> 00:10:49,200 It'll be back on when you get to where you were. 213 00:10:52,440 --> 00:10:54,800 Ooh! Oh! 214 00:10:54,840 --> 00:10:56,400 Third time is totally the charm. 215 00:10:56,440 --> 00:11:00,400 But, no come, come back here. Oh, God. 216 00:11:00,440 --> 00:11:02,360 OK. All right. OK. 217 00:11:03,560 --> 00:11:07,160 What's going on? I need that hat, though, aah! OK. 218 00:11:11,840 --> 00:11:12,960 SHE WHISTLES 219 00:11:13,000 --> 00:11:14,480 There's the mannequin. 220 00:11:19,960 --> 00:11:23,200 This is gonna be the first time I've ever been fast at anything. 221 00:11:23,240 --> 00:11:27,320 Get on there, argh! 222 00:11:33,680 --> 00:11:36,640 Can't reach it, I can't reach it, I can't reach it. 223 00:11:36,680 --> 00:11:38,600 You're circling him. 224 00:11:38,640 --> 00:11:41,080 Argh! 225 00:11:42,960 --> 00:11:44,960 Stop, you bastard! 226 00:11:45,000 --> 00:11:46,800 Stop. 227 00:11:46,840 --> 00:11:48,280 Aah! 228 00:11:48,320 --> 00:11:50,560 I am a speedy cyclist! 229 00:11:53,640 --> 00:11:56,600 Oh, no. Aah! 230 00:11:56,640 --> 00:11:59,160 I'm a speedy cyclist! 231 00:11:59,200 --> 00:12:00,720 Go away! 232 00:12:00,760 --> 00:12:02,560 I've stopped the clock. 233 00:12:02,600 --> 00:12:04,200 Oh. 234 00:12:04,240 --> 00:12:05,720 Yeah! 235 00:12:05,760 --> 00:12:07,040 I'm a speedy cyclist! 236 00:12:09,840 --> 00:12:12,320 I am a speedy cyclist. 237 00:12:12,360 --> 00:12:14,280 I've stopped the clock. 238 00:12:14,320 --> 00:12:16,240 Thank you, Morgana. Welcome. 239 00:12:16,280 --> 00:12:17,440 APPLAUSE 240 00:12:18,920 --> 00:12:20,800 Throughout the series so far, 241 00:12:20,840 --> 00:12:23,440 I've tried not to be ageist towards Alan 242 00:12:23,480 --> 00:12:25,400 because I'm a man of a certain vintage myself, 243 00:12:25,440 --> 00:12:28,240 but I couldn't help but thinking that's how you ride a bike anyway. 244 00:12:28,280 --> 00:12:30,920 Very much so. Desiree, I know you were worried 245 00:12:30,960 --> 00:12:33,880 about, you know, being high-beamed in the crotch 246 00:12:33,920 --> 00:12:39,280 but my feeling was, it was like ballet watching you. Just poised. 247 00:12:39,320 --> 00:12:41,240 It's never been said about me, 248 00:12:41,280 --> 00:12:44,240 so I will receive it as though it were sincere. 249 00:12:45,360 --> 00:12:47,680 Morgana, tried to do a little cheat, 250 00:12:47,720 --> 00:12:50,680 little whistle when Alex's back was turned. 251 00:12:50,720 --> 00:12:53,960 If only we'd remembered all those pesky cameras. 252 00:12:57,120 --> 00:12:59,560 I can't really tell from the video how well they did. 253 00:12:59,600 --> 00:13:00,880 So give me some statistics. 254 00:13:00,920 --> 00:13:02,080 Yeah, well, I can tell you 255 00:13:02,120 --> 00:13:04,440 that Morgana made a mistake with the balloon. 256 00:13:04,480 --> 00:13:06,520 It was meant to be a red balloon. Oh, man. 257 00:13:06,560 --> 00:13:07,800 I didn't read that. 258 00:13:07,840 --> 00:13:10,920 And she was also fairly quick on the bicycle. 259 00:13:10,960 --> 00:13:13,480 She did the whole course in 68 seconds. 260 00:13:13,520 --> 00:13:15,040 She made nine mistakes, 261 00:13:15,080 --> 00:13:16,520 so 68 divided by two nine times, 262 00:13:16,560 --> 00:13:19,000 she did the whole course in one sixteenth of a second. Oh. 263 00:13:19,040 --> 00:13:21,440 Whereas Alan did it in 72 seconds and made five mistakes. 264 00:13:21,480 --> 00:13:25,120 That divided by two five times is two and a half seconds. 265 00:13:25,160 --> 00:13:27,760 And Desiree, 84 seconds, five mistakes, 266 00:13:27,800 --> 00:13:31,360 so she is the slowest so far, 2.625 seconds. Very good. 267 00:13:31,400 --> 00:13:33,760 Time for some adverts now. 268 00:13:33,800 --> 00:13:35,000 Hope there's one 269 00:13:35,040 --> 00:13:39,800 with a rapper selling food he wouldn't himself touch in real life. 270 00:13:53,120 --> 00:13:55,920 Hello, again. Thank you for joining us for the second part of the show. 271 00:13:55,960 --> 00:13:57,200 What's been happening, Alex? 272 00:13:57,240 --> 00:14:00,280 Well, I just enjoyed a banoffee pie-flavoured vape 273 00:14:00,320 --> 00:14:01,720 with the guys outside. 274 00:14:02,840 --> 00:14:06,760 Also, the current task is to complete our bike course 275 00:14:06,800 --> 00:14:08,520 as slowly as possible. 276 00:14:08,560 --> 00:14:10,920 For the final race we've got Guz Khan and, 277 00:14:10,960 --> 00:14:12,160 in the interests of contrast, 278 00:14:12,200 --> 00:14:14,600 first-time cyclist Victoria Coren Mitchell. Here we go. 279 00:14:16,920 --> 00:14:17,960 Good luck, Guz. 280 00:14:18,000 --> 00:14:19,400 OK, brother. 281 00:14:19,440 --> 00:14:22,600 On your marks, get set, task. 282 00:14:22,640 --> 00:14:24,240 Oh. 283 00:14:26,840 --> 00:14:29,240 Aah! 284 00:14:29,280 --> 00:14:32,480 OK, oh. Uh... You haven't crossed the line yet, it's all right. 285 00:14:32,520 --> 00:14:34,320 OK, all right. OK. 286 00:14:36,640 --> 00:14:39,760 We're off. Ah! Oh, my God, oh, my God! 287 00:14:41,440 --> 00:14:43,840 I think the trick is constant motion. Is that how it works? 288 00:14:43,880 --> 00:14:47,480 OK. Aah! I have to pick up a thing? 289 00:14:47,520 --> 00:14:49,040 Yes, please. 290 00:14:49,080 --> 00:14:51,040 But, uh, that's so dangerous. 291 00:14:51,080 --> 00:14:52,880 Right, I'm gonna have to stop to pick it up. 292 00:14:52,920 --> 00:14:54,440 OK. 293 00:14:56,440 --> 00:14:57,760 Whoo-ha-ha-ha! 294 00:15:01,000 --> 00:15:02,920 Aah, aah! OK, OK. 295 00:15:02,960 --> 00:15:04,360 Come on, there we go. 296 00:15:04,400 --> 00:15:07,400 There, there, ah! Oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God! 297 00:15:07,440 --> 00:15:09,760 I can't, oh. 298 00:15:09,800 --> 00:15:12,280 I was actually psyched up to drop it in and then I didn't. 299 00:15:12,320 --> 00:15:14,600 I can't do it with one hand. There we go. 300 00:15:17,000 --> 00:15:19,000 Oh! 301 00:15:19,040 --> 00:15:22,120 OK, OK, OK, there we go. 302 00:15:22,160 --> 00:15:23,960 There... Ah, ah! 303 00:15:24,000 --> 00:15:26,200 Aah! No, I'm sorry. 304 00:15:26,240 --> 00:15:28,920 You can't do this with one hand. 305 00:15:30,800 --> 00:15:32,520 A-ha! 306 00:15:34,760 --> 00:15:36,920 It's too fast. It's too fast. 307 00:15:39,880 --> 00:15:41,560 Put that on there. 308 00:15:45,720 --> 00:15:47,280 I'm a speedy cyclist. 309 00:15:47,320 --> 00:15:49,560 I am a speedy cyclist. 310 00:15:49,600 --> 00:15:51,560 Now I've gotta post it. Aah. 311 00:15:51,600 --> 00:15:53,840 It goes very quickly downhill! 312 00:15:53,880 --> 00:15:56,040 Oh, my God. 313 00:15:57,280 --> 00:15:59,120 Oh, God. 314 00:16:03,640 --> 00:16:05,200 I've stopped the clock. 315 00:16:05,240 --> 00:16:07,200 Is it finished? Oh, thank God. 316 00:16:20,040 --> 00:16:21,760 I've stopped the clock. 317 00:16:21,800 --> 00:16:25,920 Can I try riding it a bit more? I feel like I've found a new skill. 318 00:16:32,600 --> 00:16:33,920 Ah. Ha! 319 00:16:33,960 --> 00:16:37,360 Do you know, without the stress of the tasks, 320 00:16:37,400 --> 00:16:40,560 it's actually much easier. 321 00:16:40,600 --> 00:16:44,880 Look at that! Oh, my God! Oh! Aah! 322 00:16:44,920 --> 00:16:47,040 APPLAUSE 323 00:16:47,080 --> 00:16:48,680 Ah. 324 00:16:52,480 --> 00:16:56,000 It's actually quite touching to see you learn to ride a bike, 325 00:16:56,040 --> 00:16:58,280 and yet I was still hoping you'd crash into that hedge. 326 00:17:00,360 --> 00:17:02,640 Guz, I thought you were just magnificent at this task 327 00:17:02,680 --> 00:17:08,600 up until the final pedal technique, which I'm fascinated by. 328 00:17:08,640 --> 00:17:10,600 The pedalling down, I'm gonna call it. 329 00:17:10,640 --> 00:17:12,160 Yeah, it's because I had to get off. 330 00:17:12,200 --> 00:17:14,680 It was really hurting and I said it to him about ten times. 331 00:17:14,720 --> 00:17:17,080 And did he help you? Of course not. You heard him in the task. 332 00:17:17,120 --> 00:17:19,360 I asked him a question and his response was "all right", 333 00:17:19,400 --> 00:17:21,240 it wasn't even answering the question. 334 00:17:21,280 --> 00:17:24,200 I'm intrigued as to what Guz did because until pedalling down, 335 00:17:24,240 --> 00:17:26,240 he looked like a professional. 336 00:17:26,280 --> 00:17:28,240 He looked good, but he was fast. 337 00:17:28,280 --> 00:17:31,680 64 seconds, he completed the course, seven mistakes, 338 00:17:31,720 --> 00:17:34,400 so when you do the maths, his final time was half a second. 339 00:17:34,440 --> 00:17:37,800 OK, and how did the person who's never ridden a bike before... aw! 340 00:17:37,840 --> 00:17:40,640 She was the slowest time out of everyone, 95 seconds. 341 00:17:40,680 --> 00:17:43,160 She was stationary for quite a lot of the time. 342 00:17:43,200 --> 00:17:46,640 Uh, eight times she put the foot down, 343 00:17:46,680 --> 00:17:50,400 so ended up with 0.124, just under an eighth of a second, 344 00:17:50,440 --> 00:17:51,880 so she comes fourth. 345 00:17:51,920 --> 00:17:52,920 Morgana is last 346 00:17:52,960 --> 00:17:57,080 but the winner of the task, with 2.65 seconds, was Desiree Burch. 347 00:17:57,120 --> 00:17:59,240 Desiree Burch. Yes. Yeah, baby. 348 00:17:59,280 --> 00:18:01,880 Now, what does that do to our scoreboard? 349 00:18:01,920 --> 00:18:05,080 OK, well, we've got joint leaders. It's these two. 350 00:18:05,120 --> 00:18:07,960 Desiree and Alan have nine points. Lovely. 351 00:18:08,000 --> 00:18:09,560 Let's have another one. 352 00:18:09,600 --> 00:18:12,040 Yes, and now for a nice round of toast. 353 00:18:25,720 --> 00:18:29,040 Hello, Alan. Hi. Do you want to go into the kitchen? 354 00:18:29,080 --> 00:18:32,160 Oh, you probably shouldn't stick that kind of thing in the toaster. 355 00:18:32,200 --> 00:18:34,680 It's a bit dangerous, innit? It's very dangerous. Eh? 356 00:18:34,720 --> 00:18:35,800 Be very careful. 357 00:18:35,840 --> 00:18:37,520 Is no one checking for, like, asthma? 358 00:18:37,560 --> 00:18:39,040 There's a lot of danger in here. 359 00:18:39,080 --> 00:18:40,000 Argh! 360 00:18:47,840 --> 00:18:48,960 Oh! 361 00:18:53,920 --> 00:18:55,720 Aah! Jesus. 362 00:18:55,760 --> 00:18:58,120 I don't feel very well. 363 00:18:58,160 --> 00:19:02,040 "Spread jam on a slice of toast in a really cool way." 364 00:19:02,080 --> 00:19:04,840 "Coolest jam spreading wins." 365 00:19:04,880 --> 00:19:06,840 I've 20 minutes? 366 00:19:06,880 --> 00:19:08,280 "Your time starts now." 367 00:19:08,320 --> 00:19:10,280 Oh, God. 368 00:19:11,320 --> 00:19:12,520 If I knew what cool was, 369 00:19:12,560 --> 00:19:15,880 I would not have arrived at this point in my life. 370 00:19:15,920 --> 00:19:19,320 Alex, I don't wanna blow my own trumpet here, brother, 371 00:19:19,360 --> 00:19:21,840 but I think the public perception of me is that I'm quite cool. 372 00:19:23,440 --> 00:19:25,840 If you are cool, Guz, what makes cool? 373 00:19:25,880 --> 00:19:29,000 Because honestly, you looked pretty frightened 374 00:19:29,040 --> 00:19:30,840 when that toaster went off. 375 00:19:30,880 --> 00:19:32,040 Yeah, OK, listen. 376 00:19:32,080 --> 00:19:36,880 I would argue that something popping out that was on fire at anybody 377 00:19:36,920 --> 00:19:39,080 would make them not look cool. 378 00:19:39,120 --> 00:19:41,000 The time when I was really like, 379 00:19:41,040 --> 00:19:43,440 "OK, I might be cool" is when I was a teacher. 380 00:19:43,480 --> 00:19:44,720 You were also a teacher. I was. 381 00:19:44,760 --> 00:19:47,080 I was the guy that would walk in the school in the morning 382 00:19:47,120 --> 00:19:49,240 and the kids'd be like, "Yes, Khan, wagwan with you?" 383 00:19:49,280 --> 00:19:51,040 I'd be like, "Yeah, yeah,", this and that. 384 00:19:51,080 --> 00:19:52,360 And when my colleagues came in, 385 00:19:52,400 --> 00:19:54,200 the kids would be like, "You're a dickhead!" 386 00:19:54,240 --> 00:19:56,840 So I was like, "Yeah, I'm like the coolest up there 387 00:19:56,880 --> 00:19:58,720 "and everyone else is a dickhead." 388 00:19:58,760 --> 00:20:01,040 It's a fair... it's a fair point. 389 00:20:01,080 --> 00:20:05,320 Good. That does make you cool, being friends with the children. 390 00:20:05,360 --> 00:20:07,720 Right, let's have a look. Who are we gonna see first? 391 00:20:07,760 --> 00:20:11,800 We're gonna begin with MorGuz-ha. MorGuz-ha. Here they are. 392 00:20:11,840 --> 00:20:15,240 Uh, let me do one just with my natural flavour, OK? OK. 393 00:20:15,280 --> 00:20:18,520 Let me see if you think this is cool, all right? OK. 394 00:20:21,600 --> 00:20:23,160 That was quite cool then. 395 00:20:23,200 --> 00:20:25,880 You see how I did that? Flicked it... ow, shit! 396 00:20:25,920 --> 00:20:27,880 That's not so cool that I burnt myself for real. 397 00:20:29,040 --> 00:20:32,760 I think that's the whole freezer. 398 00:20:39,040 --> 00:20:41,400 In bed with Morgana. 399 00:20:44,560 --> 00:20:45,920 Whoo! 400 00:20:50,040 --> 00:20:52,040 Now? Now! 401 00:20:54,400 --> 00:20:57,120 Wow! Are you ready? 402 00:20:57,160 --> 00:21:00,240 Yes. Just a little more enthusiasm, my G. 403 00:21:00,280 --> 00:21:04,200 Are you ready? Oh, yes! Oh, I like that! 404 00:21:15,800 --> 00:21:17,400 So close. 405 00:21:23,880 --> 00:21:26,240 All right, thanks, Morgana. 406 00:21:27,720 --> 00:21:28,840 Cool guys. 407 00:21:28,880 --> 00:21:30,760 Lot of cool going on in there. 408 00:21:30,800 --> 00:21:35,200 Guz said, "Let me just do one with my natural flavour." 409 00:21:35,240 --> 00:21:36,480 LAUGHTER 410 00:21:36,520 --> 00:21:38,920 Then you, uh, flicked the lid of the jam jar off. Yeah. 411 00:21:38,960 --> 00:21:42,920 At that point, I was thinking, "That's not that cool." 412 00:21:42,960 --> 00:21:44,600 Then you burnt your hand. 413 00:21:44,640 --> 00:21:50,880 I was thinking, "Oh, no, that isn't, no, that's definitely not cool." 414 00:21:50,920 --> 00:21:54,160 And then he shattered my expectations. Ooh. Ooh. 415 00:21:54,200 --> 00:21:55,680 Because I am surprised 416 00:21:55,720 --> 00:22:02,080 by how cool I found applying jam to toast with two croquet mallets. 417 00:22:02,120 --> 00:22:03,360 Yeah. That is cool. 418 00:22:03,400 --> 00:22:06,880 I actually did find myself going, "That's pretty cool." 419 00:22:06,920 --> 00:22:10,240 Um, Morgana, I think you may have misread the task. 420 00:22:10,280 --> 00:22:12,160 Uh, we wanted you to try and look cool 421 00:22:12,200 --> 00:22:13,600 while putting jam on some toast. 422 00:22:13,640 --> 00:22:16,000 I think you might have read, "Have a full breakdown." 423 00:22:19,520 --> 00:22:22,840 I generally have... I'll have one of those every day. 424 00:22:23,800 --> 00:22:26,560 What was that that you popped down your top? Cornettos! 425 00:22:26,600 --> 00:22:29,160 That was In Bed With Madonna. It was a terrible idea. 426 00:22:29,200 --> 00:22:32,440 Well, I was using my cool-o-meter throughout. Hmm. 427 00:22:32,480 --> 00:22:36,360 I thought "Oh, this is awful. We probably need to intervene." 428 00:22:36,400 --> 00:22:38,400 Yeah. Up until right at the end, 429 00:22:38,440 --> 00:22:40,880 when you took a little bite of your pea-covered jam toast. 430 00:22:40,920 --> 00:22:45,400 Yeah, uh... I thought, "Fairly cool." Lucky me. 431 00:22:45,440 --> 00:22:46,520 Cool as you like. 432 00:22:46,560 --> 00:22:48,040 Let's see some others. 433 00:22:48,080 --> 00:22:49,520 OK, two really cool people next. 434 00:22:49,560 --> 00:22:52,080 They're your classic jam spreaders, Alan and Desiree. 435 00:22:56,080 --> 00:22:57,520 BELL DINGS 436 00:22:57,560 --> 00:23:00,280 That's cool. Hey, toast, hey, little toastie. 437 00:23:02,640 --> 00:23:04,280 Difficult to say, really. 438 00:23:04,320 --> 00:23:07,240 It's all in the eye of the beholder, isn't it? 439 00:23:07,280 --> 00:23:09,280 You know, what's really cool is... 440 00:23:11,280 --> 00:23:15,280 Oh, I love you. I love you so much, you little beautiful toast. 441 00:23:15,320 --> 00:23:16,760 Ahh. 442 00:23:16,800 --> 00:23:17,800 AUDIENCE GROAN 443 00:23:19,520 --> 00:23:22,560 Fine, get away! I never loved you. 444 00:23:23,880 --> 00:23:29,080 It's always cool to have one pair sort of in here, isn't it? Yeah. 445 00:23:29,120 --> 00:23:33,840 It's quite cool to have one pair on top of your head. 446 00:23:33,880 --> 00:23:35,240 Wow. 447 00:23:43,800 --> 00:23:45,880 Oh, that felt really cool. 448 00:23:49,000 --> 00:23:51,880 Oh, yeah, I guess I should put a political statement up here. 449 00:23:51,920 --> 00:23:57,200 But first, it would be super cool if her boobies stayed up. 450 00:23:57,240 --> 00:23:59,200 Yeah! All right. 451 00:24:00,400 --> 00:24:01,680 Oh, no! 452 00:24:03,800 --> 00:24:08,120 You'd be hard pressed to think of a cooler way. 453 00:24:08,160 --> 00:24:10,440 A whole strawberry there. Is there? 454 00:24:10,480 --> 00:24:12,760 I was just mentioning that for health and safety reasons 455 00:24:12,800 --> 00:24:14,600 cos of the power of this thing. 456 00:24:14,640 --> 00:24:17,360 So all the kids are socialists these days. 457 00:24:17,400 --> 00:24:20,600 He's swaggering around the hotel gardens. 458 00:24:20,640 --> 00:24:23,120 Oh, no, he's going to blow leaves. He's going to blow leaves. 459 00:24:23,160 --> 00:24:25,120 What's the point? But actually... 460 00:24:29,880 --> 00:24:30,880 That! 461 00:24:31,960 --> 00:24:33,880 That is a game changer. 462 00:24:33,920 --> 00:24:35,080 This is temporary. 463 00:24:35,120 --> 00:24:38,440 It's going to rain, but the memory of what was once there will 464 00:24:38,480 --> 00:24:39,880 still have an impact. 465 00:24:47,000 --> 00:24:50,560 The coolest thing I saw was Alan ringing that little bell. 466 00:24:50,600 --> 00:24:54,280 Is it cool to spit lick some jam onto toast? 467 00:24:55,560 --> 00:24:56,920 It felt rock and roll. 468 00:24:56,960 --> 00:24:59,880 I don't think it's going to get you invited to cool parties. 469 00:24:59,920 --> 00:25:02,360 Oh, get that girl that spits jam onto toast! 470 00:25:04,120 --> 00:25:07,080 There was a moment where I thought that Alan... 471 00:25:07,120 --> 00:25:09,520 ..that Alan walking round the garden with three 472 00:25:09,560 --> 00:25:14,720 pairs of sunglasses on with a leaf blower in his hand and some jam 473 00:25:14,760 --> 00:25:18,560 toast in one hand, I thought, there is something quite cool about that. 474 00:25:18,600 --> 00:25:21,840 But it was when you started blowing jam from the blower onto 475 00:25:21,880 --> 00:25:23,680 the toast that you lost cool points. 476 00:25:24,840 --> 00:25:27,680 An anti-capitalist stance is certainly cool. Yes, right? 477 00:25:27,720 --> 00:25:30,120 I'm not sure the anti-capitalist stance was driven 478 00:25:30,160 --> 00:25:32,280 home by the toast-titted woman. 479 00:25:33,880 --> 00:25:37,400 Yeah, but you know like sex is still used to get across messages, 480 00:25:37,440 --> 00:25:38,760 even in politics, you know? 481 00:25:38,800 --> 00:25:40,600 Yeah, well, listen, who am I to judge, but... 482 00:25:40,640 --> 00:25:42,280 Well, you're the Taskmaster. 483 00:25:42,320 --> 00:25:45,080 Yeah, but who am I to judge 484 00:25:45,120 --> 00:25:48,080 whether a square-titted toast woman is sexy or not, is what I mean. 485 00:25:49,480 --> 00:25:51,040 Right, let's have another break. 486 00:25:51,080 --> 00:25:54,680 My nan always said someone's always trying to sell you something. 487 00:25:54,720 --> 00:25:58,040 She was, with the best will in the world, terrible company. 488 00:25:58,080 --> 00:25:59,080 See you in five. 489 00:26:10,560 --> 00:26:13,960 Hello. Welcome back to Taskmaster and to part three. 490 00:26:14,000 --> 00:26:16,480 Hey! I do the numbers, you cheeky cow. 491 00:26:18,880 --> 00:26:22,240 Sorry, I didn't know that was going to come out like that! 492 00:26:22,280 --> 00:26:24,680 The task in play sees our five wannabe winners trying to 493 00:26:24,720 --> 00:26:26,720 spread some jam in a really cool way. 494 00:26:26,760 --> 00:26:30,280 There's just one hip cat left - it's Victoria. 495 00:26:30,320 --> 00:26:33,520 My question, Alex, both about this task... 496 00:26:33,560 --> 00:26:37,480 I mean, it's a question I've been asking since I was a teenager, who decides what's cool? 497 00:26:38,560 --> 00:26:39,760 Since you were a teenager, 498 00:26:39,800 --> 00:26:42,800 Greg Davies has always decided what's cool. 499 00:26:42,840 --> 00:26:49,080 What I think's cool is, you know, customising your own inhaler. 500 00:26:49,120 --> 00:26:50,880 You know what I mean? Like having different 501 00:26:50,920 --> 00:26:53,520 glasses for different occasions. 502 00:26:53,560 --> 00:26:55,440 Not necessarily a motorbike. 503 00:27:02,680 --> 00:27:05,040 This is another thing about cool people. 504 00:27:05,080 --> 00:27:06,760 They're daredevils, aren't they? 505 00:27:06,800 --> 00:27:08,880 They have little regard for their own health. 506 00:27:08,920 --> 00:27:15,760 My thinking is, right, that, by using the spade for gardening, look, 507 00:27:15,800 --> 00:27:18,280 it's got some... And then spreading it like that. 508 00:27:18,320 --> 00:27:20,160 If I eat this toast 509 00:27:20,200 --> 00:27:24,080 and don't think about what might have been on the spade or the germs 510 00:27:24,120 --> 00:27:28,920 or what might happen to me, a lot of people would be preoccupied with, 511 00:27:28,960 --> 00:27:33,040 you know, what if they got a bit ill and they got a bit sick? And not me. 512 00:27:34,960 --> 00:27:36,640 No. Whoa, that was cool! 513 00:27:36,680 --> 00:27:38,080 I literally don't care. 514 00:27:38,120 --> 00:27:39,880 Is it gritty? 515 00:27:39,920 --> 00:27:41,120 I'm not delighted by it. 516 00:27:42,680 --> 00:27:46,640 There's literally a bit of mud! That's disgusting, but cool, yes. 517 00:27:46,680 --> 00:27:47,680 Thanks, Victoria. 518 00:27:52,480 --> 00:27:55,560 Have you ever customised your own inhaler? 519 00:27:55,600 --> 00:27:56,720 I have done that, yes. 520 00:27:58,240 --> 00:28:00,840 Oh, you have? Did you bedazzle your inhaler? 521 00:28:00,880 --> 00:28:03,080 Yeah. You stuck jewels to it? Yeah. 522 00:28:03,120 --> 00:28:05,680 Well, not jewels, but little glittery stickers. 523 00:28:05,720 --> 00:28:07,120 Oh, Victoria! 524 00:28:07,160 --> 00:28:10,080 But, as you can see from there, I just, I don't fear death. 525 00:28:10,120 --> 00:28:13,120 In fact, the more this series goes on, the more I yearn for it. 526 00:28:15,560 --> 00:28:17,840 And that is literally the only cool thing about me. 527 00:28:17,880 --> 00:28:19,040 Here we go, then. 528 00:28:19,080 --> 00:28:23,400 I am going to put Desiree and Morgana on two points each. 529 00:28:23,440 --> 00:28:27,480 Although there were cool moments, the overall flavour was unhinged. 530 00:28:29,240 --> 00:28:31,600 Not cool. Very cool! 531 00:28:31,640 --> 00:28:33,760 All the coolest people are unhinged! 532 00:28:33,800 --> 00:28:38,480 I'm going to give three points just because of her defiance to the 533 00:28:38,520 --> 00:28:42,640 jam-spreading trowel-wielder that is Victoria Coren Mitchell. 534 00:28:42,680 --> 00:28:43,840 Three cool points, OK. 535 00:28:43,880 --> 00:28:47,040 Here we go, and just because he dinged that bell beautifully 536 00:28:47,080 --> 00:28:49,360 and then when he held the leaf blower for a beat 537 00:28:49,400 --> 00:28:52,160 and looked around the garden as if he doesn't care what people 538 00:28:52,200 --> 00:28:55,640 think, I'm going to give Alan an undeserved four points. 539 00:28:55,680 --> 00:28:57,560 Wow. Three pairs of sunglasses, four points. 540 00:28:57,600 --> 00:29:02,280 And, Guz, undeniably changing the future of croquet 541 00:29:02,320 --> 00:29:06,560 single-handedly is the coolest person here, five points, Guz Khan. 542 00:29:06,600 --> 00:29:07,600 There it is. Guz Khan. 543 00:29:10,120 --> 00:29:12,120 Have we got time for one other? 544 00:29:12,160 --> 00:29:13,160 We probably have. 545 00:29:13,200 --> 00:29:17,440 It's probably a team one and it's probably riddled with tasks. 546 00:29:34,160 --> 00:29:35,880 Hi. Hello, Desiree. 547 00:29:35,920 --> 00:29:37,520 Hello. Hello, Alan. 548 00:29:38,800 --> 00:29:39,800 Where's Alex? 549 00:29:41,400 --> 00:29:42,400 Oh! 550 00:29:44,920 --> 00:29:49,800 Solve the riddle. 551 00:29:49,840 --> 00:29:51,720 ALL: You must all stay in your rooms. 552 00:29:53,000 --> 00:29:54,480 Fastest wins. 553 00:29:54,520 --> 00:29:55,600 Your time starts now. 554 00:29:57,000 --> 00:29:58,880 Also, you will get two bonus points 555 00:29:58,920 --> 00:30:02,360 if you can make one of your team-mates say submarine. 556 00:30:02,400 --> 00:30:04,720 You may not say submarine at any point. 557 00:30:04,760 --> 00:30:06,360 If they think you've tried to make them 558 00:30:06,400 --> 00:30:09,400 say submarine, you lose two points. 559 00:30:09,440 --> 00:30:11,920 Your time starts now. 560 00:30:11,960 --> 00:30:13,720 BELL RINGS 561 00:30:13,760 --> 00:30:16,920 But the proper etiquette with riddles is that you tell 562 00:30:16,960 --> 00:30:18,720 someone the riddle. 563 00:30:18,760 --> 00:30:20,520 And then they solve it. 564 00:30:20,560 --> 00:30:23,440 So just, just putting that out there. Right, I'll... 565 00:30:23,480 --> 00:30:25,760 Suggestion for the suggestion box. 566 00:30:30,480 --> 00:30:33,160 Did anyone else find Alex not telling you what the riddle 567 00:30:33,200 --> 00:30:34,520 was irritating? Yeah. 568 00:30:34,560 --> 00:30:38,080 The whole thing was a pain in the arse, this one, wasn't it? 569 00:30:38,120 --> 00:30:39,320 The worst shit I've ever... 570 00:30:39,360 --> 00:30:40,680 Honestly. 571 00:30:40,720 --> 00:30:43,200 So Morgana had her own personal task in that caravan. 572 00:30:43,240 --> 00:30:46,440 She was mainly meant to make these two people say the word submarine. 573 00:30:46,480 --> 00:30:48,640 And they didn't know anything about it. Let's play on. 574 00:30:48,680 --> 00:30:50,600 We're going to see the team of two first of all. 575 00:30:50,640 --> 00:30:53,920 Here's how our super intelligent quiz show legends got on. 576 00:30:56,760 --> 00:30:57,760 Hat and a tache. 577 00:31:00,600 --> 00:31:01,920 I've got a really big head. 578 00:31:03,000 --> 00:31:04,000 Solve the riddle. 579 00:31:07,720 --> 00:31:11,040 You may only open me when someone looks like Charlie Chaplin. 580 00:31:12,920 --> 00:31:13,920 ON PHONE: Hello? 581 00:31:15,560 --> 00:31:16,560 Hello? 582 00:31:24,520 --> 00:31:25,800 Victoria? Ah! 583 00:31:25,840 --> 00:31:28,200 Can you hear me? Ooh, yes. 584 00:31:28,240 --> 00:31:31,960 My task says, "Solve the riddle, fastest wins." 585 00:31:32,000 --> 00:31:33,000 So does mine. 586 00:31:33,040 --> 00:31:36,240 I've also got a jigsaw with letters on the back, 587 00:31:36,280 --> 00:31:40,720 a piece of paper with some coded letters, and an envelope. 588 00:31:40,760 --> 00:31:41,760 Have you got anything? 589 00:31:41,800 --> 00:31:44,640 I've got a bell, an orange, 590 00:31:44,680 --> 00:31:48,880 and attached to my table is a bowler hat and a moustache. 591 00:31:48,920 --> 00:31:52,040 Can you make yourself look like Charlie Chaplin and tell me 592 00:31:52,080 --> 00:31:53,440 when you've done that? 593 00:31:53,480 --> 00:31:55,440 Copy that. 594 00:31:55,480 --> 00:31:56,840 Just doing the jigsaw. 595 00:31:59,320 --> 00:32:01,800 I now look like Charlie Chaplin. 596 00:32:03,080 --> 00:32:05,720 Excellent, in that case, I'm going to look in an envelope. 597 00:32:05,760 --> 00:32:07,080 Copy that. 598 00:32:07,120 --> 00:32:10,560 Inside the envelope is a diagram. 599 00:32:10,600 --> 00:32:15,520 It could be a picture of a room with an X marking something. 600 00:32:16,720 --> 00:32:20,320 On one side of it, there's a big square. 601 00:32:20,360 --> 00:32:23,520 To the left, there'd be an X on the wall. 602 00:32:25,480 --> 00:32:28,640 Sorry, Victoria, I'm not seeing any Xs. 603 00:32:28,680 --> 00:32:33,640 The X is behind something that might also be a door or a window. 604 00:32:35,000 --> 00:32:37,040 I've nearly finished the jigsaw, though. 605 00:32:37,080 --> 00:32:39,520 I mean, it's missing some pieces, which doesn't help. 606 00:32:39,560 --> 00:32:42,480 So I think you might have the other half. 607 00:32:42,520 --> 00:32:43,840 AUDIENCE GASPS AND CLAPS 608 00:32:43,880 --> 00:32:45,800 I think I've found the jigsaw pieces. 609 00:32:47,680 --> 00:32:51,040 OK, I'm going to attempt to decipher this code. 610 00:32:54,360 --> 00:32:57,840 G must equal T. That'll be L. 611 00:32:57,880 --> 00:33:00,160 Do your edges, do your edges first. 612 00:33:00,200 --> 00:33:02,280 Always a good idea to find the corners. 613 00:33:02,320 --> 00:33:04,680 What if you haven't got any corners? Just crack on. 614 00:33:04,720 --> 00:33:06,640 F must be S. 615 00:33:06,680 --> 00:33:08,720 Oh, no, where's the rest of his head? 616 00:33:08,760 --> 00:33:11,360 What is greater than T? 617 00:33:14,240 --> 00:33:15,680 I bet there should be a comma. 618 00:33:17,880 --> 00:33:20,480 A equals E. B equals L. 619 00:33:20,520 --> 00:33:21,840 Is B L? 620 00:33:21,880 --> 00:33:23,320 Hello, Victoria. 621 00:33:23,360 --> 00:33:24,960 Have you got a code on the back of yours? 622 00:33:25,000 --> 00:33:26,560 Yes, and I've nearly deciphered it. 623 00:33:26,600 --> 00:33:28,040 Just give me one more minute. 624 00:33:29,760 --> 00:33:31,280 A is E. 625 00:33:31,320 --> 00:33:33,920 And this is something I'm supposed to decipher? I've got a pen. 626 00:33:33,960 --> 00:33:35,160 I'm nearly done. 627 00:33:35,200 --> 00:33:37,280 I don't know what J is, but I'm nearly there. 628 00:33:37,320 --> 00:33:38,920 J equals C. 629 00:33:40,400 --> 00:33:41,400 How do you know that? 630 00:33:43,080 --> 00:33:46,440 Because I've got a code on the back of my jigsaw. 631 00:33:46,480 --> 00:33:47,960 Oh, you've got the early letters! 632 00:33:48,000 --> 00:33:50,080 Have you got E equals Y? 633 00:33:50,120 --> 00:33:51,680 E equals Y. 634 00:33:51,720 --> 00:33:53,800 OK, I think this is the riddle. 635 00:34:07,600 --> 00:34:09,440 What if the answer is nothing? 636 00:34:09,480 --> 00:34:10,680 Does that work? 637 00:34:10,720 --> 00:34:14,120 Alex has nothing, the Taskmaster needs nothing, 638 00:34:14,160 --> 00:34:16,160 and if you eat nothing you'll die. 639 00:34:16,200 --> 00:34:17,720 Ooh, that's pretty good. 640 00:34:17,760 --> 00:34:20,000 Is nothing the answer? Do you want me to stop the clock? 641 00:34:20,040 --> 00:34:21,840 Yeah. I've stopped the clock. 642 00:34:21,880 --> 00:34:23,680 Alex has stopped the clock. 643 00:34:23,720 --> 00:34:24,720 Thank you very much. 644 00:34:29,800 --> 00:34:32,040 Well, seeing Victoria spring into life there 645 00:34:32,080 --> 00:34:34,880 was like watching an athlete in her prime, I thought. 646 00:34:34,920 --> 00:34:38,160 This is my task, she thought, and she just got on with it. 647 00:34:38,200 --> 00:34:41,480 Barely stopping to think whether Alan could contribute. 648 00:34:42,840 --> 00:34:47,960 Which is merciful because Alan to me seemed to take on the persona 649 00:34:48,000 --> 00:34:53,280 of Charlie Chaplin and just sort of mooch about the space. 650 00:34:53,320 --> 00:34:55,840 I mean, I have to say, we didn't think anyone could solve it with 651 00:34:55,880 --> 00:34:57,720 only half the jigsaw, but she managed to do it. 652 00:34:57,760 --> 00:35:01,160 It's very much a task drawn from the world of the customised inhaler. 653 00:35:03,160 --> 00:35:04,160 Well done to both. 654 00:35:05,240 --> 00:35:08,160 Yeah, their time was 33 minutes and 33 seconds. 655 00:35:08,200 --> 00:35:11,200 And there's a lot to work out there, so that's pretty quick. 656 00:35:11,240 --> 00:35:12,320 Great. All right. 657 00:35:12,360 --> 00:35:15,680 As part three fades into oblivion, let's hold each other tightly 658 00:35:15,720 --> 00:35:18,600 and remember we're just made of atoms. 659 00:35:18,640 --> 00:35:20,000 Yes, even me. 660 00:35:20,040 --> 00:35:21,640 See you soon, atom family. 661 00:35:32,520 --> 00:35:35,360 Hello. Welcome back to Taskmaster. 662 00:35:35,400 --> 00:35:39,040 In line with the current task, I've got a riddle for you, Alex. 663 00:35:39,080 --> 00:35:41,720 I work when I play, and I play when I work. 664 00:35:41,760 --> 00:35:42,840 What am I? 665 00:35:42,880 --> 00:35:45,280 You're six foot eight of solid manly muscle? 666 00:35:45,320 --> 00:35:47,280 You know it, hot pants! 667 00:35:47,320 --> 00:35:48,880 There is indeed a riddle task in play. 668 00:35:48,920 --> 00:35:51,320 Can the team of three with their extra brain complete 669 00:35:51,360 --> 00:35:53,120 the task in less than 30 minutes? 670 00:35:53,160 --> 00:35:55,880 Can Morgana make her team-mates say the word submarine? 671 00:35:55,920 --> 00:35:58,880 Surely it won't be the longest task we've ever filmed? 672 00:35:58,920 --> 00:36:00,520 Let's see how they got on. 673 00:36:04,600 --> 00:36:05,600 BELL RINGS 674 00:36:06,640 --> 00:36:08,080 Hello, guys, can you hear me? 675 00:36:09,320 --> 00:36:10,320 What is that sound? 676 00:36:10,360 --> 00:36:12,240 Hello, Morgana, Desiree. 677 00:36:12,280 --> 00:36:13,360 Is that helpful? 678 00:36:13,400 --> 00:36:15,560 Hello, Desiree, are you there? It's your friend, Guz. 679 00:36:15,600 --> 00:36:17,080 It's my friend who? 680 00:36:17,120 --> 00:36:18,680 Hello, hello, hello? 681 00:36:18,720 --> 00:36:21,560 Hello? Do you have any clues for me? 682 00:36:21,600 --> 00:36:22,920 I've got a jigsaw. 683 00:36:22,960 --> 00:36:24,560 Yeah, why, what you got? 684 00:36:24,600 --> 00:36:28,520 I've got a bell, a pen and a clementine. 685 00:36:28,560 --> 00:36:29,880 And a jigsaw? 686 00:36:29,920 --> 00:36:31,680 No, YOU have the jigsaw. 687 00:36:31,720 --> 00:36:33,240 Guys, can you hear me? 688 00:36:33,280 --> 00:36:34,360 Hello, Morgs? 689 00:36:34,400 --> 00:36:36,640 Hey, what do you have in your room? 690 00:36:36,680 --> 00:36:38,000 Who, me? 691 00:36:38,040 --> 00:36:40,120 No, we already got your jigsaw puzzle down, Guz. 692 00:36:40,160 --> 00:36:42,360 Morgana, what do you have in your room? 693 00:36:42,400 --> 00:36:45,040 I have, you know, like the Beatles. 694 00:36:45,080 --> 00:36:47,080 You have the Beatles in your room? 695 00:36:47,120 --> 00:36:48,600 Like an album? 696 00:36:48,640 --> 00:36:49,640 Yes. 697 00:36:49,680 --> 00:36:51,000 It's yellow. 698 00:36:51,040 --> 00:36:52,360 So Yellow Submarine? 699 00:36:53,800 --> 00:36:55,560 I think that's it, baby. 700 00:36:55,600 --> 00:36:57,280 What have YOU got? 701 00:36:57,320 --> 00:36:59,080 He's just got a jigsaw puzzle, apparently. 702 00:36:59,120 --> 00:37:01,240 I've got three rubber ducks. What is that, man? 703 00:37:01,280 --> 00:37:03,480 Or like plastic ducks. 704 00:37:03,520 --> 00:37:06,120 Hello, this is Guz Khan with information, over. 705 00:37:06,160 --> 00:37:08,520 So it says on the back of this piece of paper, 706 00:37:08,560 --> 00:37:12,400 "You may only open me when someone looks like Charlie Chaplin." 707 00:37:13,960 --> 00:37:16,680 Hello, guys. This is Guz with another revelation. 708 00:37:16,720 --> 00:37:18,600 Would you like the revelation now, over? 709 00:37:18,640 --> 00:37:20,560 Well, I don't know if I do. 710 00:37:20,600 --> 00:37:23,480 I've just found this glue-on moustache and a bowler hat. 711 00:37:23,520 --> 00:37:25,400 But what about this revelation, over? 712 00:37:25,440 --> 00:37:27,720 Sure, just give us the revelation, then. 713 00:37:27,760 --> 00:37:30,600 So on the back of this puzzle, there are letters 714 00:37:30,640 --> 00:37:33,200 and an equals sign on some of them. 715 00:37:33,240 --> 00:37:36,240 But once Desiree looks like Charlie Chaplin, 716 00:37:36,280 --> 00:37:38,800 then we can crack open this envelope, over. 717 00:37:38,840 --> 00:37:40,880 You can crack open the clue. 718 00:37:40,920 --> 00:37:43,560 Cheers. Guz with another revelation, over. 719 00:37:43,600 --> 00:37:46,560 And now I have a map of something. 720 00:37:46,600 --> 00:37:49,640 It looks like a pair of doors and there's an X on it. 721 00:37:49,680 --> 00:37:52,680 Does it look like you can figure out where the X is located? 722 00:37:52,720 --> 00:37:54,640 Probably not. 723 00:37:54,680 --> 00:37:56,160 I've just had an idea. 724 00:37:56,200 --> 00:38:00,120 Can you put the map out into the corridor so you're both 725 00:38:00,160 --> 00:38:04,160 technically still in your rooms but you can show each other your stuff? 726 00:38:04,200 --> 00:38:05,280 Presumably. 727 00:38:05,320 --> 00:38:06,600 Is that the double doors? 728 00:38:06,640 --> 00:38:10,160 OK, so if that's the case, the X is on this wall. 729 00:38:10,200 --> 00:38:11,560 OK, I'm going to make my jigsaw. 730 00:38:11,600 --> 00:38:13,080 It's here somewhere. 731 00:38:15,160 --> 00:38:16,720 Hold on, I found another puzzle. 732 00:38:22,600 --> 00:38:25,320 Guys, there's been another revelation in the lab. 733 00:38:25,360 --> 00:38:26,560 So many revelations! 734 00:38:26,600 --> 00:38:28,120 Layers upon layers! 735 00:38:28,160 --> 00:38:29,240 "USVG." 736 00:38:29,280 --> 00:38:33,800 HE READS LETTERS PHONETICALLY 737 00:38:33,840 --> 00:38:35,840 It's like a cypher for kids! 738 00:38:35,880 --> 00:38:38,680 So the letter A equals E. 739 00:38:38,720 --> 00:38:40,280 B is L. 740 00:38:40,320 --> 00:38:43,320 Guz, have you assembled your half of the puzzle, over? 741 00:38:43,360 --> 00:38:45,440 Sorry, guys, I'm just temporarily distracted. 742 00:38:45,480 --> 00:38:47,680 Can you just repeat that? Fuck me in the face! 743 00:38:49,280 --> 00:38:51,360 It said O equals O. 744 00:38:52,480 --> 00:38:57,320 W equals P, and that is the end of the jigsaw. 745 00:38:57,360 --> 00:38:58,560 I'm not sure it's the end. 746 00:38:58,600 --> 00:39:02,000 I haven't had V - V for Veronica is... 747 00:39:03,080 --> 00:39:04,640 Who the fuck is Veronica? 748 00:39:05,920 --> 00:39:08,680 V - victory. What does victory equal, Guz? 749 00:39:08,720 --> 00:39:10,360 Romeo. 750 00:39:10,400 --> 00:39:12,080 V equals T. 751 00:39:12,120 --> 00:39:13,960 How can it be? 752 00:39:14,000 --> 00:39:15,720 How can two things be T? 753 00:39:18,040 --> 00:39:20,600 Can you retrieve his whole puzzle for me, please? 754 00:39:20,640 --> 00:39:22,320 Zulu equals golf. 755 00:39:22,360 --> 00:39:25,800 Sorry to cut you off, I can send the Taskmaster's assistant to 756 00:39:25,840 --> 00:39:29,640 just get Guz's half of the puzzle, if you're OK with that, Guz? 757 00:39:29,680 --> 00:39:31,880 Why didn't we do that 45 minutes ago? 758 00:39:31,920 --> 00:39:33,680 Yeah, send him. 759 00:39:33,720 --> 00:39:36,360 Give the whole bloody lot, just in case. 760 00:39:36,400 --> 00:39:37,640 Here, mate. 761 00:39:37,680 --> 00:39:41,200 Oh, you are a wonderful human being, thank you so much. 762 00:39:41,240 --> 00:39:44,000 Z is G. 763 00:39:44,040 --> 00:39:46,280 OK. Oh, God! 764 00:39:46,320 --> 00:39:48,200 Greater than the T. 765 00:39:48,240 --> 00:39:50,160 A task... 766 00:39:50,200 --> 00:39:53,400 ♪ This task is shit 767 00:39:54,880 --> 00:39:58,600 ♪ Got four hours to get to the end! ♪ 768 00:40:00,840 --> 00:40:01,840 E... 769 00:40:02,920 --> 00:40:04,840 More evil... 770 00:40:04,880 --> 00:40:08,120 ♪ This task is shit! ♪ 771 00:40:08,160 --> 00:40:09,840 All right, y'all. I got this riddle. 772 00:40:09,880 --> 00:40:11,000 Are you ready for it? 773 00:40:11,040 --> 00:40:12,120 Yes! 774 00:40:12,160 --> 00:40:17,800 What is greater than the Taskmaster, more evil than the devil, 775 00:40:17,840 --> 00:40:19,480 and if you eat it you'll die? 776 00:40:22,040 --> 00:40:24,640 What is greater than the Taskmaster? 777 00:40:24,680 --> 00:40:26,480 Nothing. More evil than the devil? 778 00:40:26,520 --> 00:40:27,520 Nothing. 779 00:40:27,560 --> 00:40:30,280 Alex has nothing, and if you eat nothing you'll die. 780 00:40:30,320 --> 00:40:32,320 The answer to the riddle is nothing. 781 00:40:32,360 --> 00:40:35,200 Oh, my God, you've only gone and fucking done it! 782 00:40:35,240 --> 00:40:39,080 Literally, this entire hour's amounted to nothing, you guys! 783 00:40:41,080 --> 00:40:45,560 CHEERING 784 00:40:45,600 --> 00:40:49,920 Well, now, firstly, congratulations on your bonus points for submarine. 785 00:40:52,360 --> 00:40:54,120 Thank you. It was cheeky, wasn't it? 786 00:40:54,160 --> 00:40:59,520 Secondly, I'm no expert in body language, but something told me 787 00:40:59,560 --> 00:41:03,520 that Desiree was maybe a little bit irritated with Guz during that. 788 00:41:05,240 --> 00:41:09,480 As frustrating as that was to watch, it was 50 times more frustrating 789 00:41:09,520 --> 00:41:12,720 because we kind of quibbled over how we were even deciphering like 790 00:41:12,760 --> 00:41:16,120 which word to use for which letter, like there was so much confusion. 791 00:41:16,160 --> 00:41:19,480 Surely Guz helped by repeatedly contacting you 792 00:41:19,520 --> 00:41:21,800 and saying there's been another revelation? 793 00:41:24,040 --> 00:41:25,200 Guz, don't get me wrong. 794 00:41:25,240 --> 00:41:27,160 I loved your song. 795 00:41:27,200 --> 00:41:30,000 Which I believe was called This Task Is Shit. 796 00:41:30,040 --> 00:41:31,040 Yes. 797 00:41:32,640 --> 00:41:34,360 That is exactly what it was called. 798 00:41:35,600 --> 00:41:38,880 It took Guz 41 minutes to actually find the riddle, which was 799 00:41:38,920 --> 00:41:41,360 just on the table in front of him. Got there in the end, though. 800 00:41:41,400 --> 00:41:43,160 It was longer than Beethoven's Ninth, 801 00:41:43,200 --> 00:41:45,720 which changed music and history forever, of course. 802 00:41:45,760 --> 00:41:46,840 Yeah, of course. 803 00:41:46,880 --> 00:41:48,440 One hour, 33 minutes. 804 00:41:48,480 --> 00:41:52,720 You don't think, uh, the song This Task Is Shit is going to hold up against that, no? 805 00:41:52,760 --> 00:41:54,400 So an hour longer than the team of two. 806 00:41:54,440 --> 00:41:55,600 Wow. 807 00:41:55,640 --> 00:41:59,560 Well, I'm going to give five points to Alan and Victoria, 808 00:41:59,600 --> 00:42:04,800 and Alan can thank Victoria heartily for those five points. 809 00:42:04,840 --> 00:42:07,000 So how many points do you want to give the team of three? 810 00:42:07,040 --> 00:42:09,120 I want to give them two points each. Two points each. 811 00:42:09,160 --> 00:42:12,240 Morgana gets a bonus two for submarine, so she gets four. 812 00:42:12,280 --> 00:42:14,040 But Victoria and Alan get five points each. 813 00:42:14,080 --> 00:42:15,080 There it is. 814 00:42:17,080 --> 00:42:19,000 Quick look at the scores. 815 00:42:19,040 --> 00:42:22,400 Right, Morgana is ten points behind the current leader, which is 816 00:42:22,440 --> 00:42:23,760 Alan with 18 points. 817 00:42:26,840 --> 00:42:29,640 Right, please leave your seats behind and head to the 818 00:42:29,680 --> 00:42:32,120 stage for the final task of the show. 819 00:42:36,440 --> 00:42:37,840 WHISTLING 820 00:42:37,880 --> 00:42:39,520 Hello, everyone. Hello. Hello, Greg. 821 00:42:39,560 --> 00:42:41,640 Hello. Alex, who's going to read the task out? 822 00:42:41,680 --> 00:42:44,400 Desiree Burch is going to read the task out, please. 823 00:42:44,440 --> 00:42:46,280 Oh, dear! It's never been that hard before. 824 00:42:46,320 --> 00:42:49,960 OK. "Get the most forks in your bucket. 825 00:42:50,000 --> 00:42:54,720 "You may only throw a fork after a full spin on your chair. 826 00:42:54,760 --> 00:42:57,320 "You must stay sat in your chair at all times 827 00:42:57,360 --> 00:42:59,440 "and you may not move your chair. 828 00:42:59,480 --> 00:43:02,200 "You have 100 seconds." 829 00:43:02,240 --> 00:43:05,280 So we've got to stay in the chair, spin and then we've got to throw? 830 00:43:05,320 --> 00:43:07,360 We can't move the bucket, we can't go to the bucket? 831 00:43:07,400 --> 00:43:09,520 No, and at the end we'll tot up the forks in the bucket. 832 00:43:09,560 --> 00:43:12,240 If other people's forks are in your bucket, then you get their fork. 833 00:43:12,280 --> 00:43:13,760 OK. You've got 100 seconds. 834 00:43:13,800 --> 00:43:15,120 HE BLOWS WHISTLE 835 00:43:15,160 --> 00:43:16,680 All spin before you throw. 836 00:43:16,720 --> 00:43:18,880 Always a full spin before you throw. 837 00:43:18,920 --> 00:43:20,240 Oh, wow! 838 00:43:20,280 --> 00:43:22,040 Got one in yours. Yes! 839 00:43:22,080 --> 00:43:23,760 Alan and Desiree, straight in. 840 00:43:23,800 --> 00:43:25,880 Lovely. There we go. 841 00:43:25,920 --> 00:43:27,280 Another successful green. 842 00:43:28,360 --> 00:43:30,040 Another green. Ah! 843 00:43:30,080 --> 00:43:32,440 Does one stuck in the floor count? 844 00:43:32,480 --> 00:43:35,280 Greg, I think Alan looks quite cool. 845 00:43:35,320 --> 00:43:36,520 Ah! He does. 846 00:43:38,680 --> 00:43:40,680 Oh! Jesus Christ! 847 00:43:42,400 --> 00:43:43,800 Oh, in! Wow, nice. 848 00:43:43,840 --> 00:43:45,440 Beautiful! Oh! 849 00:43:45,480 --> 00:43:46,600 Lovely. Beautiful. 850 00:43:48,080 --> 00:43:49,480 A lot of greens going in. 851 00:43:51,680 --> 00:43:53,840 Mine keeps bouncing out every time. 852 00:43:55,960 --> 00:43:57,280 Oh, so annoying! 853 00:43:59,240 --> 00:44:01,400 That was absolutely delightful, Victoria. 854 00:44:01,440 --> 00:44:02,440 Straight in. 855 00:44:03,680 --> 00:44:04,960 Argh! 856 00:44:05,000 --> 00:44:06,000 Ah! 857 00:44:08,200 --> 00:44:09,200 Ah! 858 00:44:09,240 --> 00:44:10,520 WHISTLE BLOWS 859 00:44:10,560 --> 00:44:12,720 That was really good fun. 860 00:44:12,760 --> 00:44:14,840 Again, again, again! 861 00:44:14,880 --> 00:44:17,720 I mean, that is genuinely the happiest I've seen any of you 862 00:44:17,760 --> 00:44:20,640 so far on this show. 863 00:44:20,680 --> 00:44:24,160 Right, well, come down and we'll add that to the final scores and see how you did. 864 00:44:24,200 --> 00:44:25,280 Well done, everyone. 865 00:44:28,520 --> 00:44:29,880 Hello. Hi, Greg. 866 00:44:29,920 --> 00:44:31,200 That was exciting, wasn't it? 867 00:44:31,240 --> 00:44:33,240 So many forks and so many buckets! 868 00:44:33,280 --> 00:44:34,600 Had a lovely old time. 869 00:44:34,640 --> 00:44:37,520 It didn't take me long to count up Guz's forks. 870 00:44:37,560 --> 00:44:40,240 Bearing in mind, at the end, he didn't spin for the last five. 871 00:44:40,280 --> 00:44:41,280 Didn't you? 872 00:44:41,320 --> 00:44:44,240 Got a long drive home - I don't want to get too dizzy, do you know what I mean? 873 00:44:44,280 --> 00:44:45,680 Fair enough - priorities, innit? 874 00:44:45,720 --> 00:44:46,720 So Guz got two. 875 00:44:46,760 --> 00:44:49,000 Then we move up to Desiree. 876 00:44:49,040 --> 00:44:51,200 There were four forks in her bucket. 877 00:44:51,240 --> 00:44:52,440 Two from her, two from Alan. 878 00:44:52,480 --> 00:44:54,680 Yeah, thank you. Pleasure. MORGANA: Alan! 879 00:44:54,720 --> 00:44:58,960 Alan meanwhile had six forks in his bucket, all from his own hand. 880 00:44:59,000 --> 00:45:02,240 Lovely. It's between Victoria and Morgana. 881 00:45:02,280 --> 00:45:03,440 How exciting. 882 00:45:03,480 --> 00:45:07,160 Morgana got two forks in Victoria's bucket. 883 00:45:07,200 --> 00:45:08,320 Ah! Lucky me. 884 00:45:08,360 --> 00:45:12,720 Victoria got five forks in her own bucket, so a total of seven. 885 00:45:12,760 --> 00:45:14,720 Seven forks! 886 00:45:14,760 --> 00:45:15,760 It's enough. 887 00:45:15,800 --> 00:45:19,560 I looked in Morgana's bucket and I saw one of Guz's forks. 888 00:45:19,600 --> 00:45:21,400 But ten of her own. Wow! 889 00:45:21,440 --> 00:45:23,720 So with an 11 fork total, she gets the five points. 890 00:45:28,920 --> 00:45:30,640 What does that do to the final scoreboard? 891 00:45:30,680 --> 00:45:32,720 She may have come last in the first three episodes, 892 00:45:32,760 --> 00:45:33,920 she has not in this one. 893 00:45:33,960 --> 00:45:37,680 Victoria comes second and Alan comes first with 21 points. 894 00:45:37,720 --> 00:45:39,120 MORGANA: Yes! 895 00:45:41,280 --> 00:45:42,640 Look! 896 00:45:42,680 --> 00:45:44,280 Alan Davies wins. 897 00:45:44,320 --> 00:45:46,680 Please go and luxuriate in your many layers. 898 00:45:46,720 --> 00:45:47,720 Whoo! 899 00:45:49,840 --> 00:45:51,320 What have we learnt today? 900 00:45:51,360 --> 00:45:53,280 Well, I read an article recently that said that 901 00:45:53,320 --> 00:45:56,400 Samuel L Jackson was the coolest man on the planet. 902 00:45:56,440 --> 00:45:59,800 But did Samuel L Jackson ever learn to ride a bike on national television? 903 00:45:59,840 --> 00:46:01,560 I'm fairly sure he didn't! 904 00:46:01,600 --> 00:46:05,160 So what we've learnt today is coolness is subjective 905 00:46:05,200 --> 00:46:09,560 and everybody can be cool in their own way, except anyone who 906 00:46:09,600 --> 00:46:12,080 chooses to wear plastic slip-on shoes. 907 00:46:13,600 --> 00:46:16,680 It's time to say goodbye but, before we go, 908 00:46:16,720 --> 00:46:19,040 let's recognise the achievements of tonight's winner. 909 00:46:19,080 --> 00:46:21,920 Once more, oh, my goodness, it's Alan Davies! 910 00:46:21,960 --> 00:46:26,080 Subtitles by Red Bee Media